Alive to Beauty

In my notebook, I write fragments

About things that make me feel awe —

The way sunlight catches water,

The way fallen fruit rests on the ground.

Next to this list, I write words:

Undoing, being undone.

Lately, I have been thinking about my body,

About the way it moves —

It is disorientating, but within this sensation

Is something germinal.

I keep swimming out beyond the rocky outcrops

Of childhood & adolescence.

The water is below blood temperature. As it cuts,

It reminds me that I must learn to live —

With myself, with tenderness.

& yet melancholy unfolds itself within me.

I go walking, moving my body with an awareness

That is the only thing I can do to curb this sadness.

Walking, I think, is a lot like reading:

The movement of limbs through space matches

The movement of eyes across a page —

Both soothe the bruises which bloom. 

When I go walking, I try to keep myself

Alive to beauty: a secret between myself & myself. 

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Ellie Fisher is a young poet and writer living in so-called Australia. You can find her creative work in Westerly Magazine, Swim Meet Mag, Gems Zine, and Pulch Mag, amongst others. Ellie’s writing often explores corporeality, tenderness, and small moments. You can find her on Instagram at @bodilyofferings.